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Whenever a lad hits up on me and asks me where I came from, I always tell them I came from a floating island in Gulliver's Travels. They laugh. Those little bastards don't know it's Laputa. Guess I'll have to change my address, whaddya think?

"Some people are curious about the kind of man I want to settle down with someday. So to end their curiosity, I'm going to state here the qualities of the bloke I want to marry. 1. He must have a stable job. 2. He shouldn't allow me to be hungry. ...

At the age I'm in, I want to find a partner to spend my lonely nights with. Something serious or not, it's fine, I just want someone to keep me warm at night. To make me feel desirable again, rekindle the fire that I might long thought died.

I have recently broke up with my boyfriend because his size is not enough to satisfy my lust. Size does matter to me, so if you don't have that huge penis, don't bother sending me a message. If you have what I've been yearning to have, message me rig...

A proper gentleman knows that bringing home beer, pizza, and listening to his woman is the best way to get laid. I am looking for a proper gentleman. I am not in a rush or anything to have one. I think it's better that we get to know each other bette...

I'm gobsmacked at how shagging is different now than when I was younger. All the new positions, toys, and acts that I never would have imagined were possible to bring pleasure. I want to find someone who is willing to teach a lady new tricks.

People tend to forget how to be happy and satisfied when they mature. We tend to bury the child within us to survive. For me, this should not be the case. There's nothing good in doing everything seriously. It's okay to have fun once in a while and m...